Suicide: A Tragic Mystery

Suicide: A Tragic Mystery

Suicide doesn’t remove the pain; it is rather transferred to the ones who are left behind alive.

  

Suicide- the word is enough to catch the attention of anyone but sadly it’s always the reason leading up to suicide that remains unnoticed. Suicide often stems from being in the state of complete hopelessness. This feeling of despair raises to that level that people takes away their own lives to find a permanent solution to the temporary problem.

The question here is- Why people commit suicide? Is it easy to end one’s own life? Is suicide a selfish or cowardly act? Generally people call it a selfish act because the act of taking your life is distressing to the saviors who are left behind to face the aftermaths.

What I personally feel is that ‘suicide’ is not a choice but a health issue. A suicide attempt is a vivid indication that something is solemnly wrong in the person’s life. Suicide doesn’t discriminate- No matter how rich or poor one is; or to which religion one belongs to, it is fact that the people who commit suicide have mental or emotional illness. The most fundamental disorder is depression, 30% to 70% of the people who commit suicide suffer from severe depression or bipolar disorder.

Everyone feel low and unhappy at times and it can come out of no apparent reason. Main concern is when this feeling stays in for a longer period of time and one loses interest in things which one once enjoyed. Depression is often ignored or untreated, it refrains people to act for them. Symptoms of depression may differ and they may manifest themselves differently from people to people. Some of the common symptoms are listed below:

Psychological Symptoms:

1.      Continuous feeling low and sad

2.      Feeling of being clueless, worthless or helpless

3.      Zero self esteem

4.      Feeling irritable and intolerant to others

5.      Loss of interest in things

6.      Problem in decision making

7.      Having suicidal thoughts

8.      Feeling anxious

9.      Difficulty in concentrating

10.  Complete hopelessness about future

11.  Cropping of unrealistic and baseless ideas

Physical Symptoms:

1.      Lowering of walking pace

2.      Speaking more slowly than usual

3.      Constipation

4.      Lack of interest in sex

5.      Feeling lethargic

6.      Changes in eating habits and weight fluctuations

7.      Change in menstrual cycle

8.      Lack of sound sleep

9.      Unexplained aches and pains

10.  Crying spells

 Remember, depression surfaces for a reason. When we suppress our inner voices, depression arises. It may be triggered by incidences like losing someone from the family, or by intense family conflict or by constant rejections or even from unfulfilled lofty goals.

 Depression isn’t something to abhor, rather it a warning sign that you are not on a right track. Love, attention, care and support are the most powerful agents in the treatment of depression. Try to be more sensitive towards people who feel depressed. Be an open listener, who understands their problems. Avoid using words like: “everything is good” or “you don’t have any reason to worry about”. Instead try saying- “I hear you”, I do understand your problem”, or “things will get better”. Advice should be simple not complicated like “let’s go for a walk together” or “I am always there for you no matter what happen but now you need more of professional advice”. Listen, but don’t judge, argue, threaten, or yell. This all requires patience, so do take care of yourself too.

# Remember the two most effective ways to reduce the risk of suicide are to build friendly and healthy relationship with the family and try to have open communication. It is important not to see depression as enemy but as an expression of struggle.

Dr. Ranbir Kaur

29th June, 2020

‘Power of Optimism in the Midst of Coronavirus

‘Power of Optimism in the Midst of Coronavirus

‘Coronavirus’ or COVID-19 is the most common word in the lexicon of people nowadays. As Corona virus pandemic unfolds across the entire world, it has transformed the world in both positive and negative ways. Thousands of people have lost their lives and lakhs of them have fallen ill from this virulent disease. The constant stream of negative news has made people feel anxious and uncertain. Being anxious is the most explicable reaction as this epidemic has affected the daily routines of people by making it dull and monotonous. It is difficult to liberate oneself from building up a feeling of helplessness and a sense of insecurity.

The coronavirus is not only affecting us physically but is more damaging to our nervous systems. We have inculcated a new habit of constantly peeking at the data updates of the virus spreading extensively. This media information easily helps our brains to spin stories of fear and dread. The uncertainty about the virus is making people more anxious through ‘social contagion’ which implies that anxiety is triggered simply by talking to someone who is already anxious. Nowadays, when we talk to our friends and relatives on phone, the major topic of our conversation is ‘Corona’ which further helps in accelerating the level of anxiety.

Staying at ‘home’ can save you from coming in physical contact with virus but it has surely become the most apposite place to be psychologically close to virus. What I personally feel, the virus has more potential of affecting the lives of people psychologically especially of elderly people who are more prone to get affected. Having the feeling of being locked at home and unable to meet friends develops the fear of isolation in them. It is hard to maintain equilibrium in the epidemic but it is high time that we should engage our minds in something which will develop positive spirit instead of an endless spiral of negative thoughts and feelings.

Just as there are two sides to a coin, there are two sides to every situation. Keeping in mind the precautions, it is time to overlook the negativity that this pandemic is spreading and focusing on the positivity which will help you view this situation from a constructive perspective. Staying positive means when you choose to see the good and it reflects your outlook towards life. The corona virus too has actually resulted in a bunch of positives for humanity as well as for our planet Earth. As far as planet Earth is considered it has been given a chance to breathe again. Pollution is lowered, the sky is clearer; wildlife is returning to newly clear waters, reduction of greenhouse gases, etc. As far as our lives are considered, in today’s fast world, the quarantine has given us the opportunity to spend quality time with our families. Families are using recipes from around the world as a time to bond together. Mealtimes offer time to talk, listen and build good family relationships.

So, in the grueling and challenging time of epidemic, we need an antidote so that we can have a positive outlook and march ahead with fortitude and strength of mind. Engross yourself in activities that are constructive, cheering, uplifting, stress reducing and laughter inducing! Together, we’ll get through this.

Dr. Ranbir Kaur

22nd May, 2020.

RAPE: The Most Inhuman Crime

RAPE: The Most Inhuman Crime

What comes to our minds when we hear the word “Rape”? Do we connect denotatively to this word or do it really emotes some kind of emotional upheaval in our minds?

Rape is a heinous crime which affects a woman both emotionally and physically. Emotional trauma turns out to be more devastating than any physical injury as it leaves non- healing scars on their minds. Women who are raped have nightmares, panic attacks, an engulfing sense of distrust and self doubt.

My questions are- What causes rapes? Is the size of woman’s dress an invitation to rape her? Is it women’s self independent attitude which bothers men’s ego?

If you ask a rapist this question, they have all sorts of irrational justification for their actions with no sense of regrets in their eyes. In this patriarchal world, rape is a stigmatized crime wherein people try to point fingers at victim instead of accused. This belief of finding fault in victim becomes the main reason of her emotional segregation wherein she is expected to remain silent to preserve her honour.

Majority of men believe that woman who wear short revealing clothes are more likely to be sexually assaulted. If revealing dresses provoke men, then why women clad in sarees and burqas raped? Rapists allege that women use heavy makeup and dark lipsticks to draw men’s attention. But my concern is if heavy makeup intensifies and exacerbates the crime then why in India, where on an average 106 rapes are reported everyday and out of which 40 per cent of the victims are minors and infants. How will they justify rape on old and aged women who are hospitalised with severe ailments, women who are in comma or suffer from some mental illness? What have these people done to attract or allure a rapist?

Another reason which leads to this crime is “desire of power” to control women. Conventional societal masculine norms are considered to function in such ways that it endorses men’s supremacy and women’s subordination and the best ploy that helps them in sustaining that authority is by demonstrating sexual aggression. Many cultures expound women been a malevolent beings sent by the devil to lead men astray. Surprisingly, the Jewish Testament of Reuben States:

Women are evil, my children…they use wiles and try to ensnare [man] by their charms … They lay plots in their hearts against men: by the way they adorn themselves they first lead their minds astray, and by a look they instill the poison, and then in the act itself they take them captive … So shun fornication, my children and command your wives and daughters not to adorn their heads and faces.”

 Many rape cases have been reported even when one is in relationships like husband-wife; girlfriend-boyfriend; live-in- relationship; friends and acquaintances. The basic reason behind this is their incompetence to take the word “NO” and further presuming that as rejection. Men with inane minds objectify women as their personal property to provide them with sexual pleasure regardless of their personal sentiments.   

Men have many preconceptualised myths like – No means yes; women feel shy to overtly say yes; women who drink and go to pub is an easy prey; advanced progressive women are more open to sex; women’s smiles is a sign of ‘yes’; etc. conceiving and spreading such kinds of myths deprives women from becoming an active agent to voice her choice. Possessing this kind of opinionated outlook robs men from being sensitive and responsive towards women.

Priyanka Banerjee in her short film ‘Devi’ sensitively talks about the victims of ‘rape’ through nine tales which portray different shades of brutality, leaving the audience in goosebumps in the end. This film beautifully acknowledges the fact that rape can happen to anyone irrespective of clothes you wear, age, social standing and above all that a husband can even rape his wife. There is a constant bell sound which reminds them that a new member is waiting to enter and women argue about the inability to accommodate more women in that room. The viewers are compelled to ask themselves that- the only shared emotion or experience these women have is that of sexual violence these women have faced. The title of the film ironically reminds us that we live in a country where we worship goddesses but we fail to extend the same kind of respect and admiration to the one who live with us and epitomises purity.

Girls are taught since their childhoods the precautionary measures with which they can save them. When she is alone she impulsively bolts the doors and windows even on a baking summer night. Instead of teaching boys to respect women, we teach our girls how to protect herself from boys. Ask a girl what she does to protect herself and she'll mark off a list of essentials: never leaving a building without her keys in hand, looking over her shoulder in the parking lot, scrutinizing faces on an elevator, avoiding parking places. Yet, despite all the precautions, women can still be at risk.

There is dire need for change and the change has to be globally. Men need to change their mindsets that woman is not an object of desire or a commodity meant to be consumed and ravished. Sex education, gender sensitization and awareness is vital as youngsters have the urge to explore being entirely unaware of the disastrous repercussions. For the safety of women there should be proper CCTV cameras in desolate areas. It is high time that instead of teaching our girls methods to avoid getting rapes, we should teach our boys not to rape. The parents of boys should take the responsibility of making their boys responsible citizens. They must be taught that ‘no means no’ and nothings else and must inculcate the sense of respect for women in them. We need to question the accused and not the victim and society needs to be more sensitive towards women who face the worst crime against womanhood.

Dr. Ranbir Kaur

02^nd April, 2020

Women Empowerment: The Word Misinterpreted

Women Empowerment: The Word Misinterpreted

One of the most misconstrued, misapprehended and misunderstood word is ‘WOMEN EMPOWERMENT’. It simply refers to an attempt to make women economically, socially and politically self reliant. It talks about the need of action to support women in self-actualizing their inner strength and vigour to empower herself.

According to the World Bank:

Empowerment is more of a process which empowers women to become an agent of change. It makes her competent enough to make choices of her own and then further transforming those choices in desired actions. It is basically the change from “can do” factor going from “I can’t” to I can”. 

There are still so many delusions and misconceptions around the world. The biggest of all is when we feel that power is something external, something that can be acquired or something that will be bestowed upon us. In my opinion, it is a fallacy of trivial minds to depend on others to attain power. Power lies within every individual and the only need is to become conscious of that power. This reminds me of Socrates philosophy which still shines today: “Know thyself”. Even Aristotle said “knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.” In rural areas women are still comparatively unaware of their inner strengths and still they blame men for their condition. My question is- Why do we expect other to empower us? Why don’t we have faith in ourselves? For how long are we going to see ourselves with self pity?

We live in 21^st century and the world is undoubtedly evolving. We could now see confidence in women’s eyes and they are brave enough to speak for their rights openly. These are the women who are self aware and know their worth. So, there is no point in questioning others because the only hurdle that comes in the way of women’s emancipation or liberation is women herself. In my opinion, if a woman is suffering in the hands of a man, the only reason behind that is- lack of faith in her inner strength. Barack Obama once said: “Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we seek.” Feminist movements have done allot to make the world a better place for women where her voice can be heard. There is no legroom for blame games now and it’s high time now that women should be brave enough to take responsibility and speak for her. This reminds me of Nobel Prize winner, Sir William Gerald Golding’s saying: “I think women are foolish to pretend that are equal to men, they are far superior and always have been.”

“Outside” affects the “inside” and the society in which we live has certain set ideologies which we replicate and which further constructs our emotional and social selves. Seeing the world from men’s viewpoint, it is evident that they are not very much comfortable with the concept of “Empowered women”. There is no doubt there are good men out there who appreciate women for being strong and professionally successful but there is subtext attached to this liberation too- that it should not be done at the cost of her domestic responsibilities. Even in 21^st century, it is hard for men to absorb the notion of an “empowered women” who gives first preference to her profession. She is expected to maintain a Work-Life balance and guilt over household chores is harming working women’s health. The woman who neglects her domestic responsibilities over her professional assignments is titled as ‘unfeminine’, fallen women or immoral. It is certainly true that we expect our young generations to be more open minded and acquire egalitarian outlook and we could see the positive change when it comes to gender roles but not in terms of domestic labour.

Ironically, by being ‘empowered’ has a completely different connotation for women. She is very much responsive about her familial errands and doesn’t intend to disregard her familial responsibilities as a daughter or as a wife. By being ‘empowered’ she only desires to have equal right to education, equal right to be opinionated and equal right to live a life of dignity.

It’s Women’s History Month, a wonderful time to become conscious and support today’s empowered young women who are doing more than making his-story and are constructing her-story. It is fight for “self actualisation” which is the process whereby every individual comprehends her inherent potential which further helps her to achieve the highest level of herself. In nutshell, I personally feel the only secret to women’s empowerment is women. She needs to think outside the box and give way to more robust global sisterhood, one in which no women are relegated to passivity and silence.

Dr. Ranbir Kaur
9th March, 2020

Secret to a Compassionate Relationship

 Secret to a Compassionate Relationship

Relationships stand on the pillars of friendship, care, compatibility, respect, understanding and above all ‘love’. Love acts like a glue which keeps the relationship strong and everlasting. True love doesn’t happen overnight; rather it needs persistence and construction. Having butterflies in your stomach and feeling anxious when you meet someone for the first time is not what true love is all about.  My question is why those butterflies stop fluttering once your relationship gets old? Why over a period of time, it becomes so tough to focus on just one person with that same high anxiety? Why things that were once so imperative become so casual?

Just think of your grandparents whose relationship have endured years and years of togetherness and whose bond inspires an awe for the care, commitment and respect they have for each other. Creating a caring and everlasting loving relationship is not as easy as it appears in the beginning of a relationship when everything looks exquisite and charming. Most people get married with a positive feeling of sharing a life together, but in reality, 40-50% end up in divorce. Famous relationship advisor Chris Armstrong says: "Things go blasé and what was once an unpredictable stroll is now an expected lull." The same relationship which once used to give them a sense of completeness has turned out to be something burdensome.

The question is how do two people maintain a happy relationship? What are the secrets to a successful marriage? The answer may vary because every relationship is different. Here are some of the most important advices that are definitely worth considering:

1.      Communication: Communication is one of the most vital skills to have in any relationship as it acts like a catalyst in knowing the person better. What I personally feel is that communication is neither about those deep and profound conversations nor about talking and sharing your whole day’s experience; it is more about ‘connecting’ while communicating. Remember- in relationships its always little things or gestures that make a huge difference. One of the traits of a compassionate relationship is that – ‘value fights over silences’. Silences are not welcomed in any relationships and can be utterly destructive when it comes to resolving issues. Try to imbibe the skill to reach each other before the things go out of control. Don’t assume things on your own and try to listen to what your partner says because communication is not just about talking. Honest communication helps the relationship to grow and evolving is crucial to make the relationship satisfying and long lasting.

2.      Gratitude: A great way to develop intimacy in a relationship is through constructive gratitude. It can act as an antidote to broken relationship. We as humans are more inclined towards critiquing for something done wrong and this trait can act as venom in ruining the relationship. Learn to appreciate as it can flourish and strengthen the relationship by promoting cycles of munificence. In my opinion it is not simply about thanking your partner for what they do for you, rather it is more about appreciating your partner for what he/she is as a person. Every relationship is different, so consider the personality of your partner and go for the best ways to express your gratitude. It can be a sweet note of thanks kept somewhere in the kitchen or a warm hug at the end of the day. So, stop taking things for granted and try appreciating your partner for their being around you in all ups and downs and see what wonders it can do facilitating a positive loop in strengthening your relationship.

3.   Phubbing: This is one of the most recurrent post- modern glitch in healthy relationships. It is basically a practice of disregarding others and giving more importance to our mobile phones. It involves constant pulling out phone, scrolling through messages, checking social media updates- in short being more engaged in what is happening inside that glass box and not in person sitting next to you. We all are being there intentionally or unintentionally, as either a victim or a perpetrator. We are so much addicted to mobile phones that we even don’t realise what profound harm we are doing to our relationships. Ironically, we are more focused on maintaining virtual relationships with people who are strangers to us through social media by disconnecting ourselves from people who are genuinely connected to us. This kind of obsessive behaviour towards cell phone facilitates relationship dissatisfaction which further initiates an emotional distance between the romantic partners. It is seen that even the presence of cell phone during the conversation (on the dinner table) negatively affects the quality of conversation, sense of intimacy and feeling of connection. So, in order to maintain a cordial relationship one should be mature enough to maintain the balance between the two worlds.

4.     Trust: Trust is the foundation for a happy and fulfilling romantic bond. Be open and honest with your partner and that will further generate trust and a sense of security both physically and emotionally within them. I read a novel which talked about relationships a few ago and the premise was basically that we understand a person by parts of them we can see. So, “most relationships aren’t actually between two people, but rather between two masks. But for authentic relationship, you need to look behind the masks. The longer you think you’ve known someone, the harder that is to do, because your preconceived ideas about a person become a part of mask you see”.

‘Trust’ in simple words is feeling safe when vulnerable. If you can’t trust a person then there is no point of being in that relationship. No matter how hard you try to maintain that relationship, it won’t last. You can’t trust a person if you constantly live in a fear that your partner will betray you and as a result you restrain from letting yourself open to your partner. Fear and trust can’t co-exist. Trusting a person means that one is confident enough to open up completely without the fear of being misjudged or rejected. Trust can’t be build overnight; it’s daily commitment and develops slowly and gradually.

Following are the points that help in building trust in any relationship

(a)    Your words and action should correspond,

(b)    keep private conversations private,

(c)    Be there for your partner both physically and emotionally,

(d)   Be sensitive to their problems,

(e)    Show genuine care and concern and

(f)    Stick to your commitments.

  I personally feel it is the consistency in action that builds a trust in a relationship. To build trust in a relationship, Bonior advocates “say what you mean and mean what you say”. Trust acts like a cement which binds two people in relationship by permitting them to live safely in society.

In nutshell, give more importance to little things to make your relationship beautiful and long lasting because its a well known saying "little things makes a big difference" and this very well fits when it comes to relationships.

Dr. Ranbir Kaur
22 February, 2020

Is it important to celebrate Valentine’s Day?

Is it important to celebrate Valentine’s Day?

On 14^th  Februrary, the aroma of love and passion will fill the air, as this day is celebrated as Valentine’s Day . The week leading to this day is filled with list of reminders making people conscious of their relationship status. This special day creates an aura of deep intimacy in their relationships as people prefer to speak the ‘language of love’.

The people who are single, this day turn out to be a day which reminds them of their loneliness which further fills their heart with a sense of being dejected. For those in relationship have created a mountain of anxiety as they have lofty of expectations from their partners. They vigorously wait for grand gestures, special dinners, surprise gifts and romantic locales coming from their valentine.

My question is: do we really need special days to declare or publicize our love? Shouldn’t we love each other every day? I once asked my friend-what she feels about Valentine’s Day. She said for her celebrating love once a year is not something that grabs her attention and interest anymore. She feels love is more about how your man makes you feel throughout the year. It’s more about how much loving, caring, understanding and considerate he is throughout the year. Making someone your queen for one day and taking all her efforts to make your house a cosy home for granted is not what love advertises.

For many this is a day of ‘love’ but I feel it is more about “appreciating” someone who has sacrificed allot to be in your life. Expressing appreciation demonstrates mutual respect and value because it shows that you do acknowledge the efforts that one has put to make relationship beautiful and stronger. To maintain that eternal sweetness in your relationship, it is important to make other person know his/her value in your life.

 In a Utopian relationship, you bring out best in your partner which further makes your relationship stronger with time. If you have been together for a long time, we start taking each other for granted. With the passage of time we often start finding our relationship monotonous and unexciting. We don’t feel the need to say” i love you” daily but that doesn’t mean that their love is fading with time. The words ‘I love you’ are often substituted with emotive words like ‘message me once you reach office, did you have your food, drive carefully, come home soon etc. which hold a sea of affection and concern within it. The only thing that is making relationships humdrum is ‘lack of time and initiative’ for each other. There is a dire need of initiatives to make your partner feel appreciated and loved. 

We humans are professionals who are slaves of daily routines. It is Valentine’s Day that helps the couples to come out of their monotonous lives of waking up, going to office, and coming back tired, having food and then going back to sleep. Time flies too fast, and before we realise that weeks have blurred into months, it’s an end of whole year. We do know the value of life and the need to embrace people who are dear to us. Sometimes we just become so casual with things that we need some kind of push or opportunity to keep life spirited and vivacious. Valentine’s Day is a special day of making your special person feels ‘Special’. It helps you to rejuvenate your relationship by saying things which are often left unspoken, doing things which are left undone and enlightening your bond with a spark of novelty and freshness again.

What I personally feel is that Valentine’s Day may not be special for people who make their partners feel loved every single day. They are the ones who don’t need occasions to give surprises to their love. For them every day is Valentine’s Day. I would prefer he gets me flowers on any day when he thought of me with love, rather than waiting for Valentine’s Day when he may not feel like giving me. Love must be celebrated daily and any gesture that is done out of emotions is always valued than doing things on so called ‘special days’ out of pressure.

As a modern woman, I personally don’t feel that it’s exclusively on men’s shoulders to be the catalyst for romance. Even women can make their men feel special; after all we talk about ‘Equality’.

The bottom line is, sometimes we do need reasons to come out of our daily routines and reimburse more into each other. One should feel privileged to have someone in life who not only makes your life more beautiful but makes you a ‘beautiful person’. Days shouldn’t matter if you believe in love and there can be nothing more beautiful than celebrating love. So guys, take out time to express your love and gratitude to that ‘special’ person of your life who is unconditionally there for you.

Dedicated to my husband

 Dr. Ranbir Kaur
13 Feburary, 2020

Christmas Special : Evolution from St. Nicholas to Santa Claus

Evolution from St. Nicholas to Santa Claus

Father Christmas, old Saint Nick and Kris Kringle are some of the names given to the most awaited man every December 24- the night before Christmas. We commonly call him ‘Santa Claus”- a fat, white beard man wearing a red coat with white fur collar, a red hat and black leather belt and has a flying reindeer who pulls his sleigh. He has a list of children as per their behaviour and comes from North Pole and circumnavigates the globe to deliver gifts to well behaved kids. But we forgot sometimes that this ebullient gnome who sneaks down the chimney every year has a history which is more than 1700 years old.

His character seems to be timeless but this man has a vibrant story of existence. Around 1700 years ago, in the heart of Roman Empire in a town in Turkey called Patara, a boy named Nicholas (means “hero of the people”) was born who appeared outstandingly sacred and divine from the time of his birth. He was a caring and compassionate boy who loved to help people by sharing his meals. At a very youthful age, he joined church and was later named as “Boy Bishop”.  When he was thirty, the old diocese of Mira needed a new person in command and the ongoing bishop received a sign from God about making Nicholas the next Bishop of Mira.

 His righteous deeds helped him earn the global reputation- known as a man who is a protector of innocents and is well acquainted with the difference between right and wrong. He once came to know that his neighbour did not have dowry for her daughter’s marriage and as a result she would be sold off into prostitution or slavery. In order to save her from dreadful fate, he secretly tied some of his own family’s gold into a handkerchief and dropped it through neighbour’s window. This further gave idea of the gifts in the Christmas stockings as people hang their socks out in front of the fireplace to dry. His repeated acts of generosity made him famous and people spoke of his late-night nameless presents and his granting of secret wishes. Being a protector of faith and humanity, he was soon named as Saint Nicolas by the people who heard and witnessed his miracles. He became embodiment of righteousness and his kind deeds made him the patron of all who were in need but he achieved his greatest fame as a patron of the most vulnerable among us i.e. children. His popularity continues to mount until the time of Reformation movement- which forbade the practice of honoring saints.  

In America, the name of Saint Nicolas went through many alterations. Dutch’s Sint Nikolass became Santa Claus in America and instead of giving gifts on his birthday (December, 6) he became a part of Christmas holiday. In 1837, a poem named “A Visit from St. Nicholas” by Clement Clarke Moore left an enormous impact on history of Christmas gift- giving.

The lines from the poem describe him as a jolly, fat man who gives gifts to all well behaved children and has changed the image of Santa Claus forever:

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;
The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads;
And mamma in her ’kerchief, and I in my cap,
Had just settled our brains for a long winter’s nap,
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below,
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer,
With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;
"Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen!
On, Comet! on, Cupid! on, Donder and Blitzen!
To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky;
So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,
With the sleigh full of Toys, and St. Nicholas too.
And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound.
He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;
A bundle of Toys he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a pedler just opening his pack.
His eyes—how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow
And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow;
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath;
He had a broad face and a little round belly,
That shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly.
He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And filled all the stockings; then turned with a jerk,
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose;
He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle,
But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,
"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night."

Moore’s poem looked both forward and back and it formed a bridge between St. Nicholas and the modern Santa Claus.

Now came the question- what does he look like? There were multiple illustrators who presented all different kinds of images and visions. Some of them looked very saintly and other looked very pagan. The cartoonist Thomas Nast, often considered as “father of American Cartoon” conceived and introduced the modern image of Claus. He added to the Saint Nicholas legend with an 1881 issue of Harper’s Weekly drawing of Santa as wearing a red suit with white fur trim. His image was inspired from the Coca Cola Company’s modern Santa Claus.  With each rendition he added new elements to Santa’s story- like his drawing of Santa with telescope conveyed that Santa lives in the North Pole. He also acquainted us with Santa’s big book of good and bad children and also showed Santa as taking a Christmas wish over the newfangled telephone. He presented the picture of Santa’s home life. So, in times to come Santa will not only be known for his generosity but for his salesmanship as well.  

Dr. Ranbir Kaur
December 25, 2019